My Pitch for The Caleb Williams Gruber Law Offices Commercial

One of my favorite Caleb Williams rumors I have heard this past week was that he was signing an NIL deal with Milwaukee-based Gruber Law Offices. For those of you who do not live in Wisconsin and may not know, David Gruber is the omnipresent face of Wisconsin sports television. His personal injury law firm is a major sponsor of most, if not all, Milwaukee franchises and UW athletics. One cannot watch a Bucks, Brewers, or Badgers game without a familiar smiling figure extolling the simplicity and comfort of "One Call. That's All." So with the rumor that Caleb Williams is about to become the next face of Gruber Law Offices, here is my pitch for his commercial, set to begin airing in August 2022:

We start with a simple cut into the commercial of Caleb standing, facing the camera, dressed in a red Gruber Law Offices polo shirt, and holding a football in his right hand, occasionally tapping it with his left. Caleb will be situated slightly to the left of frame, with the Gruber Law Offices logo and a motion W occupying the right of frame. Behind Caleb we see a red-tinted aerial view of Camp Randall Stadium on a game day. As we cut in, Caleb says, "This is Caleb Williams, quarterback for YOUR Wisconsin Badgers." We then cut to some footage of Williams' 2021 Oklahoma season (keep in mind that he has not played a snap for the Badgers yet at this point). We blot out the script "Oklahoma" on his jersey, Jordan logo, and OU on the helmet, rendering it a generic red uniform. Overlaid on this footage would be some generic announcer excitedly shouting "Caleb Williams! Touchdown!" We then cut back to the standing Williams from the beginning of the commercial who says, "When I need a big play, there's only One Call."

We now cut to a fictional setting of the 2022 National Championship Game. Caleb Williams in a Wisconsin football uniform gathers under center. A slightly low angle frames Williams as he prepares his cadence. Extras in dorky, ill-fitting uniforms populate the rest of the frame (with long sleeves for some reason - why do football players in commercials always have loose sleeves?). Matt Lepay's recorded call blares forth, "Four seconds remaining. Time for one last play for the Championship." Williams takes the snap, and the camera follows his drop back, zooming in slightly. We cut to a shot from Caleb's point-of-view. Everyone's covered! We then cut to a close-up of Caleb as Lepay provides the narration with some corny football-movie melodramatic colloquialism that no one in real life would ever say, such as: "Nobody's open, what will Williams' call be?!" At that moment Williams winks at the camera. At the signal of the wink, Kenny Loggins' 1986 hit "Playing With The Boys" plays as Williams triumphantly advances down the field. We cut to a camera view situated in front of Williams, reversing in order to follow his progress down the field as Williams faces the screen. As he advances, Williams evades three would-be tacklers. As he does, the camera slows to show the names on the backs of the defenders' jerseys which read "Medical Expenses," "Insurance Deductibles," and "Short-term Disability." As the scene plays out, Lepay's voice calls out, "He's at the 15, 10, 5, Touchdown Wisconsin!" We cut to an overhead shot of the endzone, revealing sript on the field that reads, "Injury Settlement." Williams spikes the ball as money begins to rain onto the field. The camera switches to a on-field view as Williams turns to greet his onrushing teammates, who lift up Williams. "What a call by Williams!" exclaims the narration from Lepay. As his teammates celebrate around him, Williams removes his helmet and says to the camera, "there's only one call!" We cut to a shot of a coach being dunked with Gatorade on the sideline. But it's not Paul Chryst. It's David Gruber! We then exit the championship scene and cut to the same shot from the beginning of the commercial. Williams is now joined in frame by a grinning David Gruber who exclaims, "Gruber Law Offices, a proud sponsor of Wisconsin athletics" as Williams and Gruber say in unison, "One Call. That's All." Cut to black.

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