B5Q Blogopean Union: BERT! IS! BACK! BABY!

Good morning! This is going to be a daily(ish) post that discusses the goings on of the rest of the Big Ten Conference, and the country as needed. Much like the European Union, the Big Ten is a loosely confederated group of entities that sometimes have the same goals (like free movement of people between countries or not winning national titles in football or basketball) and sometimes accept new members that they later regret (Estonia or Rutgers).

We hope that you will use this post to comment on things happening around the conference and also as a sort of daily open thread to discuss breaking news or argue about Spotted Cow (which we NO LONGER DO).

• Jonathan Taylor seems to have hit whatever the opposite of a “rookie wall” is. This is what we colloquially call “a Man’s Run.”

• I ordered a bottle of Duke’s Mayonnaise Sunday afternoon and it appeared on my doorstep Sunday night because the future is wild. Hopefully we’ll have some Mayo Content up on the blog this week.

• As we are about the enter Big Ten play for men’s hoops, here is an excellent thread about why the Badgers have been playing so well this year. Spoiler: a lot of the lineups with Tyler Wahl have been doing VERY well.

• While Jack Coan entering the transfer portal was hardly surprising, the outpouring of love and respect from his former teammates was equally unsurprising.

• Missed this during the game on Saturday but Chase Wolf entered an exclusive list.

• Friend of the blog, Champaign Room senior editor and Wisc News 3 Producer Stephen Cohn got toasted and roasted while just trying to enjoy his morning on Sunday. That’s what we call the Bielema Effect!

• Also of note, Owen wrote here about how much he liked Letterkenny back at the beginning of quarantine and when the new season’s trailer came out BUCKY’S 5TH QUARTER WAS INCLUDED AS A REVIEWER!

• Dylan Holloway should play a big role in Canada trying to defend their World Juniors title this year.

• Anna Smrek won’t be eligible to play until next fall, but she’s enrolling early and will get plenty of practice time with the team.

• Gonzaga is really good this year, folks. Despite a big game from Luka Garza, the Hawkeyes lost to the Bulldogs over the weekend.
• Penn State TE Pat Freiermuth announced he’s heading to the NFL after the Nittany Lions pounded the Illini on Saturday.
• Nebraska, who everyone knows saved Big Ten Football this year, decided to OPT OUT of playing in a bowl game! Smdh, scared of the Huskers probably.
• Purdue beat Notre Dame in the Crossroads Classic, continuing the Big Ten’s dominance over the ACC.
• Ummmm, Northwestern beat No. 4 Michigan State in men’s hoops on Sunday night. They, uh, beat them by 14 (!!!) points too.
• Per tradition, a Big Ten West team was beating Ohio State for long enough to get people’s hopes up and then, you know, the inevitable happened.
• Stop patronizing Northwestern? Only once they stop patronizing the rest of us! Freaking nerds.
• Rutgers men’s basketball beat Illinois at the RAC on Sunday and the rest of the Big Ten is now on notice that the Scarlet Knights are for real. And here’s the view from Illinois’ point of view.
• Bret Bielema (!!!) is now the head coach of the Illinois Fighting Illini football team.
• Indiana got jobbed by the bowl selection process.
• Here’s how the Gophers are feeling after losing to Wisconsin for the 16th time in their last 17 tries.
• SPARTY NO!