This past weekend, eight former Wisconsin Badgers were given opportunities to live their dreams and extend their playing careers professionally. Some were drafted, some given deals as undrafted free agents, and still others were thrown in the lion-pit of pro try-outs.
Here are their situations, ranked:
- Pros: Close to home for the California native. Limited QB competition for practice-squad spot.
- Cons: Franchise uncertainty pending upcoming move to Las Vegas. Team owned by Old Man Bucky Larson.
- Pros: No wide receivers were taken by the Giants in the draft. Gets to live in NYC.
- Cons: Has to go to Toastmasters with Eli.
- Pros: Solid secondary in AZ. Also, solid Tex-Mex.
- Cons: Rattlesnakes. Unbearable heat. Carson Palmer constructed of spare ligaments, medical tape, and hastily compiled paper-mâché.
- Pros: Competition for roster spot not terribly great. Coach Bill O’Brien is a talented offensive mind. Gets to hang out with J.J. Watt.
- Cons: Houston.
- Pros: Legit chance to make the roster. Close to home for the New Jersey native.
- Cons: Philly fans. #goiggles. Has to pretend Donnel Pumphrey’s rushing record is legit.
- Pros: New Orleans is the best. Gets to play on an offense led by Drew Brees. Millions of dollars.
- Cons: May grow to 400 pounds on the glorious food in the Big Easy. Will likely just be hitting his stride when Brees retires.
- Pros: Steelers fans love their linebackers. Good team, good culture. Iron City is actually not a terrible cheep beer. Millions of dollars.
- Cons: The Yinzer accent is the third-most unbearable in the country behind only the New England “Masshole” and the Chicago “Da Bears.”
- Pros: Wisconsin kid gets drafted by the Green Bay Packers with a chance to play in his first year. It’s like something your grandmother would embroider for you on a pillow when you were eight. There is literally no down side to this. None, whatsoever.
- Cons: See Above.