The Big Ten is out of the video game business.
Like when the NCAA was out of the video game business. This does sound more important than it really is. I mean, you can negotiate with every athletic program for individual rights. But that being said? This could get expensive. Individual negotiations could lead to, at the very least, a Mississippi State being left by the wayside.
And there is a reasonable chance the Badgers might be done with video games for a while. So the question is, who do the Badgers become. I'll give you the five most likely choices.
1. The LaFollette University Polecats
With the graduation of Wide Receiver Jarrett Babbfred, the passing game may be a question, but with the one-two punch of Gordon Marvin and Clem Cory, the Polecats look to mark their territory and the Big Misnomer with a strong running game and a defense that likes to attack and rend flesh with all sorts of blitzes.
The fans do have a tendency to sing "Almost Paradise" when the offense is knocking on the door, but EA could well use something else off the Footloose Soundtrack.
2. The Mad City College Riot
You looking to get extreme? Strap yourself in, Chuckles! Behind the all-around awesomeness of Mack "Big Mac" Tanner, you have the one weapon that's going to keep you in every game? If he doesn't throw for three hundred and rush for two hundred? It's your fault! Or you're not playing in Junior Varsity.
"Black Magic" from Slayer blares as the Riot run out of the tunnel.
3. The State University Street
You want a hip whiz-bang offense? You go with these guys. No-huddle? Sure. Diamond formations? If you can get the commitment from five star recruit Bo Nixon, we're not going to stop you! This team is about fun-factor and wish fulfillment and the Street just want to be there first.
Are you going to just run nothing but the Wishbone? Basically. But FIDLAR's a perfect soundtrack for it.
4. The Madison University Muskies
Buying defunct minor league baseball licences proves easy and fruitful. Giving them Oregon's uniform choices proves to make this team fun. Unfortunately, the Muskies don't get De'Anthony Thomas running so fast your opponents are all like "this is unfair" and you get a rage quit.
The Theme Song from Party of Five plays at the start of every fourth quarter.
5. The Wisconsin Sadgers
It's just an import of the 2008 team. 1-AA West gets a power-up against them. This RB #38 seems to be able to do some things though. Unlikely? Maybe. But John Clay deserves a second chance.
The tradition? Three guesses.
More from Bucky's 5th Quarter:
- Dan Voltz injury: Wisconsin center tweaks hamstring in practice
- Wisconsin's problem areas: Badgers lack serious depth at certain positions
- Badger Bits: Wisconsin basketball sets attendance records
- Post-Practice Roundup, Aug. 13: Wisconsin's quarterbacks rebound
- Monday's scrimmage: Crushing blow for Tanner McEvoy?